Grace

That whole grace thing I mentioned last post is really nice to talk about. No really, it's amazing to talk about -- God offering free help to his people? It's incredible! However, it is a lot more difficult to apply to real life than you might think, or, more personally, than I might think.

My youth pastor's wife (LOVE her) sat with me for what felt like forty-five minutes after youth group tonight and listened to me pour out my frustrations -- first over a little thing like organizing a quarter activity at school, then about a big thing like my friends, my parent's expectations of them, and how my interpretation of their expectations plays out in real life.

Over and over again she told me, "Obey what God's given you to do to the best of your ability. After that, it's Not Your Fault." It's not my fault what my friends think after that. It's not even my fault what my mom expects of me, even though I'm planning to listen to her and her dreams and prayers and thoughts and hopes and wisdom for my life. Because ultimately, I'm not answering to Mrs. Colleen, my friends or my mom. I'm answering to God.

All that really, truly matters is God and his amazing, beautiful, fantastic grace. As long as I'm right in the middle of it, doing my best to follow his instructions, it's not my fault.

Really, that's freeing.